A conversation between Donna Martin, Andrea Zuckerman and Kelly Taylor as they get ready to attend the Twilight Convention.

You may not be aware of this, but apparently there is something called a "Twilight Convention".  The Twilight convention is a lot like a Star Wars convention, except that a bunch of obsessed, nerdy women  go instead of men. 

This is a conversation between the girls of Beverly Hills 90210 as they are getting ready to head to the convention.  


I just completed this post and reread it and I have no idea if this is funny or just plain strange.  I was going to just delete it, but I will let you, the Blog O' Cheese audience decide.  Besides, just like episodes of 90210, they can't all be winners, right?


Donna: What do you think Kelly?  Can I pull off the dark, mopey Bella sweatshirt look?

Kelly: Donna, please - you are Donna Martin!  You can pull of any look you want.

Donna: [giggles] Maybe in 1990, but I am 38 years old now.

Andrea Zuckerman: COME ON YOU GUYS!  Would you please stop chatting!  We are going to be late for the first Volteri Vixen face painting.  It's in the Forks Crossing room and I do not want to be late!

Kelly: How about me? Is my skin too sparkly?

Donna: Oh Kelly, we are going to the Twilight Convention.  Everyone knows there is no such thing as "too sparkly".

Kelly: Tell that to Dylan.  He is so mean to me sometimes.  I just hate him!

Andrea Zuckerman: Seriously guys!  Billy Burke - AKA - "Charlie Swan"  is going to be signing posters in the Clearwater room in 20 minutes.  If I miss that, I am going to go vampire-ape crazy both of you!

Donna: Steve kinda looks like a vampire.  Do you think Steve could be a vampire?

Kelly: Sometimes you are such an idiot, Donna.  Does Steve have FANGS?!  Is Steve WHITE and PALE?!  Does Steve have a SICKLY way about him?! Oh wait...

Andrea Zuckerman:  You two are such... morons!  PLEASE HURRY!  The "Jacob Black chest rub" is in the Northwest wing at 2:00 and you two are still not dressed!  Trust me, you do not want to miss that.

Donna: Are we going to go to the Peach Pit before?  I'm hungry.

Kelly: You are always hungry Donna.  Besides, I heard the "Esme Smoothies" at the convention's Bite Bar are awesome.

Donna: Maybe you can get by with a smoothie, but I need meat.  Maybe a porterhouse.

Kelly: I wonder if David is going to DJ the convention?

Donna: I hope not.  He's supposed to be watching the kids.  Besides, I've told him over 100 times that being a DJ at 40 is just pathetic.

Andrea Zuckerman: WHAT ARE YOU TWO EVEN TALKING ABOUT?  HURRY UP! If I miss the Cullen culinary vegetarian demonstration, these plastic fangs in my mouth will be shoved directly up...

Kelly: Where are the body sparkles? I just need to add a few more sparkles.

Donna: Do you think Brandon would be jealous if he saw you ogling at Jacob today?

Kelly: Brandon?  No, he is a gentleman.  Always has been.  He's from Minnesota, you know.

Donna: Don't you guys think it is a little sad that we are 38 and going to the Twilight convention?

Kelly: Well, I bet we will be younger than most the women there.

Andrea Zuckerman: FINE, I AM LEAVING WITHOUT YOU! I want to be at the doors when it opens.  I hear the first 2,000 people get a free bottle of Edward cologne, and one lucky winner will get acting lessons from Kristen Stewart.

[Slams door behind her]

Kelly: Donna, did you say something?

Donna: No.  You?

Kelly: Nope. You ready to go?

Donna: Yeah, but I swear we are missing someone.  Hm...

Kelly: BRENDA!  Where's Brenda?!

Donna: We'll find her.  She's probably at the bar with Dylan. Do I look okay?

Kelly: Donna, as always, you look like a large Haflinger horse.

Donna: Thanks Kelly.  You've always been a good friend.