Tuesday, September 13, 2011

First Grade Divas

The following was a conversation I had with a first grade class after reading the word "diva" in the book Lilly's Purple Plastic Purse. The names have been changed. Even mine.

Cheeseboy: Does anyone know what the word "diva" means?

Cindy: Yes, that is a girl that is really bad.  Does really bad things and stuff.

Cheeseboy: Well, yes. Some divas do very bad things.  But not all.

Lisa: A diva is like a girl singer. A girl singer that is famous.

Cheeseboy: Yes! That's right.

Amanda: I know a diva. Hannah Montana is a diva.

Gerald: Hannah Montana? I've been there. It takes like 4 hours to drive there.

Cindy: Hannah Montana's real name is Miley Kie-rus.

Cheeseboy: You mean Miley Cy-rus?

Cindy: No... Miley... KIE-RUS!

Cheeseboy: No, the C makes the S sound in Cyrus.

Cindy: I know it's KIE-RUS. I have the magazines.

Cheeseboy: Okay.

Amanda: Lady Gaga is a diva!


Cindy: My mom says she is one of the divas that does really bad stuff like I was talking about before.

Cheeseboy: Okay, that's great girls. Let's get back to our story now. As I was saying...


Amanda: No he is not! He is not a diva!

Cheeseboy: [Laughing hard now] Yes, I guess he does sing like a girl. But you actually HAVE to be a girl to be a diva.

Amanda: His girlfriend is Selena Gomez. She is a diva.


Cheeseboy: Alright, settle down. Yes, Selean Gomez is a diva. Justin Bieber is not. Alright, back to the story.

Jenny: The Little Mermaid, Ariel, she's is a diva.

Cheeseboy: Yes, I suppose she is.

Adrienne: AND TANGLED! Tangled is a diva!

Cheeseboy: Yep. Tangled is a diva. Is Tangled her name? Ah, nevermind. Okay, as I was saying...

Jenny: Mr. Cheeseboy, who's Lady Gaga?

A good friend of mine's brother has recently started a blog called "Stoney Acres".  It is a blog dedicated to farming and becoming self efficient in an urban setting.  Very interesting.  Stop by and give it a look or follow. Click here.

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

I'm back.

I doubt I've been missed much, but I needed a break from blogging.  It happens to me from to time, kinda like my reoccurring case of Swimmer's Itch.

So now I'm back, like the Terminator, but without the illegitimate children or the housekeeper/baby mama waiting in the wings. 

During my blogcation, I did done some deep thinking.  I thought long and hard and then I thought short and soft about my blogs future.  I did a lot of thinking of varying firmnesses and lengths.  

Alas, I decided to continue the blogging on the great Blog O' Cheese, but I determined that it was taking too much of my time, especially considering that I have a budding Twitter career just hitting the big time. (@Cheeseboy22) 

It is because of my desire to free up more time and then to waste that time into nothingness that I have decided to place a few restrictions on my return.  They are thus:

1. I will only post once a week, likely on Tuesdays.  I will save my best ideas for this one post and by "best" I mean, "the crap you are used to". 

2. My posts will be primarily humorous stories from my life.  I've found that these are generally the most well received and tend to be the funniest.  Occasionally I may write a nonsense post or a opinion piece, but there are only so many crappy products to make fun of.

3. I will continue to attempt to comment on my close blog friend's blogs at least once per week.

4. If you post a comment on my blog, I will do everything in my power to return the favor on your blog. That is, if you leave a trail for me to follow.  If you are not linked back to your blog on your profile, I have no way of finding you and heaven knows, everyone loves to be found on the internets. 

So there you have it.  I'm back, but with some caveats, which is perfect because I love fish eggs on my morning blog post bagels.  I appreciate all my beloved followers sticking with me and I promise to reward you with either some hilarious writing or 30% off coupons for everyone at Bed, Bath and Beyond. 

I hope you chose the writing.