Ancient Chinese Proverbs - by Cheeseboy.

Give a man a fish, you'll feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and you'll feed him for a lifetime.

Give a boy a 'Diary of a Wimpy Kid' book, he'll be occupied for an hour.
Give a boy a Nintendo DS, you'll never hear from him again.

Give a man a dish full of food and he will be a happy man.
Teach a man to properly load the dish in the dishwasher and he will avoid the doghouse for quite some time.

Give your child the job of cleaning his room and it will never get done.
Teach your child how to clean his room and you will end up doing all the work.

Give a teacher a thank you card for Teacher Appreciation and he will think you are terrific.
Give a teacher a thank you card with a gift card to Five Guys attached and he will think you are terrific and he will get fat.

Give your first grade class a box of crayons and they will get used.
Allow your class to use washable markers and they will never use crayons again.

Allow your first graders to use washable markers and one will always draw a mustache on himself.
Take the washable markers away and tears will wash off the mustache.

Give your kids a dollar for a lost tooth and they are joyous.
Teach your kids not to be jealous when the neighbor kid gets five dollars per tooth and that will never work.

Give a first grader a stapler and they will use 28 staples on a single page.
Keep them in from recess and give them a stapler remover and they will stab themselves with it.

Give your sons a trampoline and they will jump on it.
Teach your sons to use the neighbor's trampoline and you will not have to buy a trampoline.

Give your spouse a kiss and you might receive one in return.
Give your spouse a foot massage and your chances at a return kiss increase by approximately 35%.
Teach your spouse to kiss and she will wonder what the heck is wrong with you.