My wife's magazines also recommend a sheek, retro look. Not a problem because Sheek and Retro are my middle names. (I have two middle names. Not uncommon during the 70's....Abram Sheek Retro Yospe. No wonder people think I am a foreigner!)
I have done some searching on various swimwear websites and I have discovered exactly what I am looking for. It is a one piece, which poses some problems when it comes to actually peeing in the pool, which I find easier than making the trek to across the molten lava sidewalk to the restroom. That reminds me - when will people that build swimming pools realize that concrete gets hot in the sun? When God created nature's swimming pools, he surrounded them with sand. Sure, sand still gets hot, but it is so fun to build in. You can't build nothin' with stinking asphalt. Oh - I also figured why it is called "asphalt".... because it's when your feet get burned on it, it's your own ass's fault!
Anyway, after studying several layouts and attending a weekend bathing suit conference at the Hyatt, I have come to the conclusion that this is the suit for me:
If I get it, I will definitely need to grow a handlebar mustache.