Friday, June 20, 2008

Great news! Calder's tongue cancer is gone!

I have fantastic news everyone.  The first thing I did when Calder woke up was check his tongue.  Sure enough... no sign of the white plague.  Phew!  The last time I felt this relieved was when I was when blood tests cleared me of rabies or the time when my doctor told me that I had to be of African American decent to get Sickle Cell Anemia. (Which I swore I had!  Interesting tidbit of information from the Cliff Claven files - Only two white people have ever been diagnosed with Sickle Cell and it was because of a random mutation in their genes.  The doctor was not amused when I suggested I might have mutated genes.  It might have been at that very minute that she realized I had a hypochondriacal problem.)

It turns out the culprit was most likely a canker.  The really scary thing is that the only difference between a canker and cancer is a hard K!  I can't help but wonder... what if that hard K had been a soft C??  Thank goodness we will never know.

After a thorough search on Google and going through a mental list of potential diseases, these are the diagnosi (diagnoseses?) that Calder potentially could have received:

HIV (After reviewing the causes of HIV, I basically ruled this out early on.)
Tongue cancer
Epstein-Barr virus
A mucus on the tongue.  (Last night I actually thoroughly cleaned and disinfected the boy's toothbrush drawer because I worried that it's disgusting nature might have caused a mucus growth on his tongue.  I also threw away his toothbrush.)
A mouth blister.

Fortunately, this case is closed.  Thank you everyone for your two cents.  I wonder what the next strange illness the boys will come up with?

The boys just left for St. George with Grandma and Grandpa.  For the first time since Lincoln was born, I am alone in my house for an extended period of time.  I am supposed to go running 18 miles tonight.  With my knee still acting up and the hot weather, I will be lucky to get to 10.  I am a little concerned as no one will be home to call the police if I pass out along the way.  Maybe I should tell the neighbor that if I am not back by 10:30 to call the police?  I will log on and post how far I go when I get back.

1 comment:

Tammy said...

I'm so happy to hear Calder's case is solved! And without any medical intervention :).

I got a call today from someone who is coming to my house to test my blood tomorrow. Cathi should be getting the call but she probably won't participate since she probably doesn't believe in research for medical problems :). Unlike those of us who are hypochondriacs!