Sunday, April 18, 2010
The monster room in my church. (It's next to the nursury.)
There is a holding room where they keep all the monsters in my church building.
The room holds 17 monsters. All 17 monsters in the room are very, very mean. They all have long, scraggly teeth.
One of the monsters has teeth like a shark and can bite a person in half. One of the monsters can swallow a small boy whole - just like that.
One really hairy monster likes to give four year old's haircuts; long, drawn out haircuts, using nothing but it's teeth and some old, rusted clippers.
There are three green, wet monsters that take all of your church treats away and replace them with gummy slime that tastes like mashed pickles.
Some monsters in the monster room will never stop scaring you. They follow you around forever.
There is no way out of the monster room.
There is only one key to the monster room and the Bishop gives it to a parent with a child that is not being reverent. HE HAS GIVEN ME THAT KEY! ARE YOU READY TO GO?
- This is exactly what I whispered to my four year old during church services today after I pulled him from under the pews for the 8th time as he was singing about Spiderman in his loudest voice. It worked... for a little while.