I was an Eagle Scout by the time I was 13. This actually worked out quite nicely as my parents had this fatuous yet customary Utah rule that I must get my Eagle Scout award before I got my Driver's License. What was even more remarkable was that when it was all said and done, my Driver's License was twice as difficult to earn than my Eagle Scout. If only I could have shown up to a couple week-long Driver's Ed Camps up in the Uintahs and screwed around with my buddies - I would have had my license in no time.
Whatever records I broke as the youngest ever Eagle Scout, I owe to my Scoutmaster. He was such a cool guy. He took us to places like Lake Powell and Moab and for every award we won, he would take us to get milkshakes. Most importantly, he was not an ordinary Scout Master. I'm not sure I ever saw him wear a scout shirt and I'm sure his presence at "round tables" was pretty scarce.
My theatrics and high jinks during my scouting years are that of legend. It all began when I discovered that I would do anything for a laugh...
It was early August and the bugs were out in force. Our trip involved a five hour drive to Goblin Valley. 10 boys jammed into a Suburban and Queen's "We Will Rock You" slamming on the cassette player, it was a prime time for whippersnapper mischief planning.
I'm not sure how much money I was offered, but I know that it had to be less than $15.00. It wasn't about the money anyway. It was more about the human spirit, conquering fears and making people laugh. Well, mostly it was about making people laugh.
As we pulled into our campsite, I looked longingly out the front windshield. It was smothered in bug guts from top to bottom. There was not a square inch that was not smeared with insect entrails. With the car finally stopped, it was time for business.
I hopped out of the Burban, ran directly to the front of the windshield with reckless abandon, stuck my tongue out and pressed it to the bottom of the glass and proceeded to drag it the entire length of the windshield. The laughter was deafening; the taste revolting.
The rush of bringing so many to a belly bursting laughter would soon become an addition. I would say anything or do anything for a laugh. It was the beginning of something special.
Life Lesson #1 - The art of the dance. Lesson #2 - Run like the wind. Lesson #3 - Say or do anything for a laugh.