1. Celebrity birthday reports.
2. Sonic drive through commercials.
3. $40.00 flashing/light up toys at the circus.
4. People that make small talk on elevators about the buttons.
5. TV shows about people with tons of kids.
6. That kidney billboard on the highway with Bronco and K-Whit.
7. The soccer lines on Rice-Ekkles field.
8. The term "cougar" for older women looking for younger men.
9. People that push the dunking tank button with their hand as a joke rather than actually having the skill to hit the button with the ball. Those people think they are funny, but they drive me insane! You're a cheater and a quitter and I don't like cheaters or quitters.
10. Dunking booths
11. People that make obnoxious, unfunny comments after previews in the movies loud enough for the entire audience can hear, unless of course, that person is me. Needless to say, the comment would obviously be funny.
That last one reminds me of the time that I, on a dare (It seems as though many of my stories start like this.) went to the front of a crowded theater waiting to see a movie. The previews hadn't started yet and people were chatting and mingling. I cleared my throat and in a loud voice I said:
Hello, my name is Abe. I enjoy walks in the park, happy reunions and snuggling. I am 17 years old and single. I look forward to watching this movie with you.
I then pointed at someone in the front row and said:
Okay, now it is your turn. Come on up here.
The girl, absolutely horrified, slumped in her seat and hid. Mission accomplished.
Okay, things that are listed on my cease to exist order. Be on alert.