Friday, February 27, 2009

My initial plans for an evening with Mr. Richard Simmons

My night with Richard Simmons
(I have drawn up plans for an evening together with Richard Simmons. Granted, I must first actually meet and befriend Richard - and he is 61 now. Doesn't look it though. Doesn't look it one bit.)
4:00 - John Schmidt concert. (Hope he plays "Waterfalls!)
5:00 - Eat hot wings at Hooters.
5:30 - Have a fight with a fire extinguisher.
5:45 - Draw each other's blood. Give blood to poor orphans.
6:15 - Step Into The Oldies, Volume 3
6:45 - Towel off, reapply grease.
7:15 - Spend time gluing glitter to red tank tops.
8:00 - Settle in and watch Ernest Goes to Camp (On separate couches, of course.)
10:00 - Attend Harlem Globetrotters game in newly bedazzled tank tops.
10:30 - Frolic through the Gateway fountains.
11:00 - Towel off, reapply grease.
11:30 - Step Into Oldies, Volume 5
12:00 - Towel off, apply nighttime "exfoliating" body oil.
12:15 - Punch Richard in the stomach, wish him well and send him on his way.


Lori said...

Sounds fun! Hey, instead of glueing the glitter to tank could glue it onto each other. I bet he would like that even more!

By the way, are you sure Cathi is Ok with you striking up a friendship with Mr. Simmons? Oh, and let me know ahead of time when this will be happening. I don't think it would be such a good idea to have Ryan sleeping over that night.

Cheeseboy said...

He he Lori. Silly Lori, one of us is heterosexual and happily married. And of course, Cathi would be invited on our night of merriment.

Esther said...

Abe. It's STEPPING TO THE OLDIES. Not Step Into the Oldies.
Don't ask me how I know. I just know.

sacdaddy said...

I'm sure you've seen this, but just in case:

(I was actually watching live when this aired)

Tammy said...

I love Richard Simmons! I think he's hilarious.

Anonymous said...

Just so you know, technically it's not glitter, they are swarovski crystals...and he's really not gay. Seriously.

Cheeseboy said...

Anon - Why would I think he was gay? I said nothing of the sort. Our evening would simply be a couple bros getting together for a good time - I could care less about his sexual preferences.