Sunday, May 2, 2010

Introducing Disney's new Man Fairy. I mean, "Sparrow Boy".

Disney recently announced plans for a male version of Tinkerbell named "Slate". Feel free to read about it here. Slate is Disney's first ever male Pixie and is bound to be a huge hit. Being the lone boy Pixie was bound to be difficult and Slate had some very difficult moments in high school, including this one in the High School locker room:

Peter Pan: Dude, what is with all the glitter all over your towel?

Slate: Oh, that? It's not mine. That's from my girlfriend's mascara.

Peter Pan: Riiiight.

Slate: Serious Pan.

Peter Pan: Well, why are you always tucking your wings? What are you trying to hide?

Slate: Nothing. I just like them that way. It's sleek.

Lost Boy: Come on Slate, we all know you're really a fairy. Just admit it.


Peter Pan: It's okay to admit it Slate. This is 2006 after all.

Slate: First of all, we prefer the name "Sparrow Boy" and secondly, fairies are not built like this!

Lost Boy: Whatever, fairy.

Peter Pan: Now, be nice. If he wants to be known as a Sparrow Boy, that's what we'll refer to him as. Is that okay with you fairy? I mean Sparrow Boy?

Slate: Come on guys, knock it off!

Lost Boy: LOOK, the fairy is crying. Look at all that sparkly dust falling out of his eyes. FAIRY IS CRYING... FAIRY IS CRYING!

Slate: I said SHUT UP GUYS! Leave me alone!

[Runs out of the room crying.]

Lost boy: That dude is such a fairy.

Peter Pan: Tell me about it! Now where did I put my green tights?

Lost boy: I don't know Pan. Have you seen my bunny outfit?


SueLovesCherries said...

Well, there are boy fairies in the Tinkerbell movies, but I'm surprised they weren't in the game yet.

Slate - sounds like a soap opera name.

Hope Chella said...

Classic!!! :-)

MiMi said...

Like Peter had any room to talk. He wears tights because he WANTS to. Poor fairy was born that way.

mintifresh said...

hahahahahah That. Was. Awesome.

RawknRobynsGoneBlogWild said...

Poor kid. It'll get easier when he hits puberty and comes out as a full fledged fairy.

sammy said...

hahaha love the dialogue!

i gotta tell you, im beyond hype right now to find another male blogger that blogs similar to me! no offense to the ladies, because i love the ladies, but its cool to see another dude doing it.

PLUS my wife and i were just talking about how bad an actor brendan fraser is. we took our kids to see his newest movie and he was terrible. BUT i voted for reeves being the worst. if brendan fraser was crack, keanu reeves would be whitney houston's career....or something like that

great blog!

Kate said...


Krista said...

Wow. Boy fairies. They should have bat wings or something a little tougher than fine fairy wings. Nothing like a fairy with an identity crisis.

lindsey v said...

My daughter was telling me about this boy fairy on just yesterday. I didn't know he was such an outcast in school though. He needs to just embrace his delicate wings and glittery trail. As soon as he accepts himself as he is then others will too. (Well, that's what they say anyway. I don't know if it actually works like that.)

Unknown Mami said...

Nothing wrong with a fairy.

Nubian said...

Very funny! You have quite the imagination, obviously never a dull moment in your head. ;)

GrammyMouseTails said...

1st boy ??? common... Oh the first they actually named!! sparrow ?? why not something more tough like a ..crow! hey they gang up on falcons & hawks! Pan wouldn't have a chance again a crow.. just saying... and whats a little glitter among friends... Is that the stuff they sniff up their teeny noses???

Anonymous said...

lol awww I love fairies! :o)

imbeingheldhostage said...

Again? Do you ever run out of hilarious topics to blog about?

järnebrand said...

Oh, if we all just had the space to be who we really are not having to worry about what other people will think. A fairy, a gorilla, a hockey player, whatever... as long as you are happy... As long as you are a good friend. I love fairies. And gorillas. Hockey players, well... not really. :)
Peace and love/ Johanna

ScoMan said...

Hahahaha This was awesome.

Another job well done Cheeseboy.

Kelly said...

Well looks like Slate has had some rough ground to cover. He'll pave the way for many more just like him though I'm sure.

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

You are so twisted. That's good!

Ally said...

Aww, I don't know if I like this very much. I'm all about fairy type dudes... yet I married a beer guzzling baseball fan :( When I first brought him home, my mom said, "He's totally not your type."

Mr. Stupid said...

HAHA. Loved it. I heard Slate and Stinkerbell were classmates. Oh yeah, that's a different story about when Tinkerbell didn't take a bath for 8 months!

Have a good day...:)

Hope Chella said...

If I can't get coffee I get Diet Coke-Not Regular-The kind with aspartame that robs the body of chromium and whatever else bad it does! I have my DC most afternoons to get through that portion of the day...I live a healthy lifestyle too :P haha

Bossy Betty said...

I would love to go to have a coffee with Slate.

Rachel said...

Oh this is too funny! So would his first name be "Jack"? As in "Jack Sparrow".

This was brilliant!

Serene is my name, not my life! said...

I would be a little worried that you know about this Tinker-boy before I ever heard of him if this wasn't so funny!

Sara said...

ohhhh Pan...

Just what I needed to start my week off right

Melinda said...

So thats what goes on in the boys' locker room eh? In the girls locker room Tinker Bell punching out Wendy (she hates her you know).

Writing Without Periods! said...

I've known a lot of Peter Pans in my life...not a good thing. Everyone needs to grow up sometime...right? Vodka and partying don't pay the rent.

Joann Mannix said...

Boy fairies are the perfect shopping companions. They can help find the best shoes.

Sparrow boy should be proud to be a man fairy. He probably toots fairy dust and that, alone, is a huge plus to any female who has experienced man gas.

Hysterical, Cheeseboy.

ModernMom said...

Eeek. Yep, this one will appea to a very small demographic!

Sara @ Domestically Challenged said...

I don't know, I think he is cute, like a little, well...fairy!!

Claire said...

I've written & deleted several comments. I keep thinking about the guy I dated whose last name was ALMOST this fairies name & that it cant just be coincidence, right? I mean, he had one ball, all the better for tights, knowwhatimsayin?
I have no idea.. but your posts havent been coming up on my reader, and now that I'm here, I'm sad for the days I missed. This was hilarious, no jokey comments from me, just pure love for this post!!

Tracie said...

Bwahahaha! Brilliant.

Beth said...

Abe! Your mind is an amazing piece of work! I bet you really kept your parents hopping when you were a kid!

I am all tucked in at my new blog. Thanks for checking on me.

Anonymous said...

Ha! Love it. Men's lib. is coming now, huh? Not that there's anything WRONG with that, (as Seinfeld would say).

Oh, yeah, and that Sammy is right! Brendan Fraser is literally the WORST, and I was happy to see when I answered your poll that many of your other readers are of the same opinion!

Cheeseboy said...

@ Sue - Yes, soap operish for sure.

@ Hope - Thanks.

@ Mimi - True. True.

@ mintifresh - Very kind of you.

@ Rawkn - Coming out as a full blown fairy is a very difficult task indeed.

@ Sammy - Yes, Brenden is the very worst, imo. I'm very glad you found me too. We man bloggers have to stick together. We are very few.

@ Kate - thanks.

@ Krista - Bat wings would be much more hard core. No way he gets made fun of with bat wings.

@ Lindsey - I am not sure if it works like that either, but the way you described it sounds great.

@ Mami - I have nothing against fairies. I simply wanted to show how hard life can be for them.

@ Nubien - Thanks. My imagination is one thing I've got going for me.

@ Grammy - Yes, exactly. Something tough. Maybe both.

@ Niki - Fairies are very prevalent in New Zealand, no? I mean because it is such a mythical, magical place?

@ hostage - I hope I never do. I'd be at a loss.

@ jarnebrand - very interested in why not hockey players. How about hockey playing fairies?

@ ScoMan - Thank you sir.

@ Kelly - a trailblazer to be sure.

@ Alex - Twisted is a compliment to me most of the time.

@ Ally - Well, that's not to say that Slate won't become a beer guzzler eventually. You never know.

@ Mr. Stupid - Your comments are always the best.

@ Hope - yep, I think we are on the same diet (except minus the coffee for me)

@ Bossy - Slate is getting a bad wrap here. I am sure he's a great guy.

@ Rachel - Ha ha! Jack Sparrow. thank you.

@ Serene - Ah, I just saw it on yahoo news and the idea came to me.

@ Sarah - Happy that I could make your week better.

@ Melinda - Oh yeah. Forgot about the jealousy issues there.

@ Periods - True. I had no idea he was into Vodka though. Interesting. I bet Pan is a mean drunk.

@ Joann - Toots fairy dust - ha ha! Wish I would have thought of that.

@ ModernMom - Very small as in fairy sized?

@ Sarah@ Domestically - Most fairies are cute. I can't think of one that is not.

@ Claire - You dated a guy named "Slate". That right there should be a deal breaker.

@ Tracie - Thanks!

@ Beth - yes, I for sure probably did. However, I didn't do much writing til I hit college.

@ FabuLeslie - Ha ha. Seinfeld should have had a fairy episode.

Mary said...



Why are they giving Slate such a hard time? They know they need his dust to fly right?