Abe in 1992 - Abe busts on the scene as a youthful, goofy chap full of endless energy, I am thawed to realities of high school and enjoy modern day life by spending Friday nights in my basement bedroom dreaming of Leah Thompson while listening to NBA basketball games on my clock radio.
Abe in 1994 - Abe is a founding member of the band "Bloody Stool" in which he and some buddies get together and hold each other hostage in an old Elementary school auditorium by playing terrible, terrible music.
Abe in 1997 - Abe grows up in Pennsylvania raised by the Amish.
Brendan in 1999 - Blast from the Past - Brendan was a naive man who comes out into the world after being in a nuclear fallout shelter for 35 years and finding the love of his life.
Abe in 1999 - Abe was a naive man who comes out into the world after hiding from his evil Amish enemies in the back seat of a '91 Ford Taurus for 2 years.
Abe in 2000 - Abe purchases a Bedazzler and uses it's powers to snare Cathi, the girl of his dreams, which he married two years previous.
Brendan in 2001 - The Mummy Returns - Brendan battles the mummified body of Imhotep is shipped to a museum in London, where he once again wakes and begins his campaign of rage and terror.
Abe in 2001 - Abe begins watching Big Brother, where he witnesses the mummified remains of Julie Chen host. He promptly quits watching soon after.
Brendan in 2008 - Journey to the Center of the Earth - Brendan is on a quest to find out what happened to his missing brother, a scientist, his nephew and their mountain guide discover a fantastic and dangerous lost world in the center of the earth.
Abe in 2008 - On a quest to find out what happened to his half eaten Five Guys burger, Abe questions every household member and discovers a dangerous lost world in the bottom drawer of his refrigerator.
Abe in 2010 - On a Utah playground, Abe is a teacher that is attacked by a vomiting adolescent that would rather puke on his shoes than head to the sick room.
Clearly, my life mirrors the great acting roles of this truly magnificent actor. It is an honor I shall never take for granted.
61 comments:
Sadly, I have an outtake photo from a picture session I did, last year, where I look like Brendan in that top picture. I have watched that clip over and over. I think it's his best work yet.
Oh, and Bedazzling skills are highly valuable during bikini waxes now.
Brendan has always had spectacular hair.
Now I want to watch Airheads. What a classic. I think my first teenage crush was Adam Sandler as Pip in that little purple hat, yeah baby.
There is something I just can't explain about Brendan Fraser which makes me uneasy. Maybe it is his ability to consistently show up in mediocre movies. I'm surprised there was no reference to School Ties (1992) since that would probably be an easy one for you to relate to.
The Bedazzler is quite the magical tool. It's evident your wife is still under it's spell, especially how she supported you by lovingly ripping off your arm hair.
Oh the puking kid, one reason I could never do what you do. I'd be puking right along with the kid....sorry
Wait -- is BF pregnant in that last photo? Or does furry vengance have something to do with some furry thing clinging to his stomach??!
Bloody Stool! How did yall not get wedding gigs??!!
Did I read somewhere that your wife is blind? KIDDING! At least your life didn't mimic River Phoenix 'cause you'd be but a memory.
Well on the upside, your gut has not mirrored B.F's in that last picture - give it a few years though!
Honestly, you should be a movie reviewer - I think I am going to have to go see that Bedazzled one. W.C.C.
Aren't you slightly worried that he suddenly might appear in slasher movies or terrible war dramas? What if he becomes the star of the new wave of silent movie that will rush over America in 2012? It could be a very quiet year for you, Abe...
Sometimes life does imitate art, and sometimes writers follow people around and get ideas from their lives.
This is eerie....
Hehehe I think that was a true streach of information to make a point ;o)
I would like a puking photo please LOL
George of the Jungle was a cinematic masterpiece. "Ursula, I found your scrunchie!"
You left out Gods and Monsters.
Wow, that is just uncanny!
Glad you have a hollywood type that you can relate to. Brendan in George of the Jungle was seriously cut! My kids have that video and I never tire of them watching it.
I'm thinking about getting my husband a flyf-lap.
The similarities are striking! Evil Amish...lmao :0)
Wow, it's like you two are the same person...trippy :)
Whoa, Brendan does indeed look pregnant in that past picture! Carrying pretty low isn't he. Probably will have a boy!
Worms... it's got to be worms.
Seriously, were you raised by the Amish?
My gracious...He is a beautiful wonderful gorgeous man. Wait, were there words in this post? Guess I better read it again. Maybe if I cover up all the pictures....
You gotta watch our for those Amish-they can be serious thugs!
I've never understood at least half (probably more) of the movies he chose to be in. I have to say he didn't hurt my eyes as George of the Jungle.
You must be very special. I love Brendan Fraser.
I adore Brendan Fraser. Doesn't matter how bad the movie is, I'll watch it if he's in it.
No wonder I like your blog so much Abe!!
I think Brendan Fraser is yummy even with a bun in the oven.
My daughter's coach in middle school, who is also a good friend of mine, challenged my girl to a jump roping contest during lunch recess. My girl is an expert jump roper. She's also an expert Spagetti-O eater which she had a whole thermos of for lunch.
It wasn't pretty. Coach said he wasn't sure if he'd ever be able to eat anything that even resembles spaghetti again.
The similarities are uncanny.
Wow - you could be twins! :)
Do you find yourself worrying over what movie he might make next since it clearly influences your life?
Wow. So do you look pregnant too??? Weird!
I've missed so many of these movies...
do you keep up with Brendan and discourage him from taking on bad drug addicted suicidal roles? or encourage?
Brendan Frasier used to be so hot. Like seriously rockin' bod. What happened to him?! P.S. I LOVED George of the Jungle. And Encino Man. And The Mummy.
The Bloody Stool, seriously?
Oh Abe! I'm not sure the average citizen realizes exactly what it is like to spend every week day of your adult life in an elementary school. It certainly does not lack for excitement.. although the excitement, much like Brendan Fraser movies, isn't exactly what you'd wish on your worst enemy. ;)
I need to see a picture of you to believe it.
I heard there is a new movie coming out with Brendan where he waxes his arm hair as a publicity stunt - PERFECT
FYI - my neighbors are Amish...
Wow you either really know and like Brenden or spent a lot of time on google.
And by greatest actor of our generation you mean embarassment right? Ok fine, don't get me wrong, I actually enjoy him just fine. But, when you look at his "career" in pictures and film titles as you just so compactly put it, it's a BIT tragic. I can't even discuss "furry vengance." I just CAN'T.
On the other hand, I'm certainly glad that your life experiences have been such that you are now able to regale us with humor and wit so we might laugh.
But are you connected to Kevin Bacon in anyway? Ha Ha
its eerie how alike you two are
I think it should be noted that we only got a face shot from "george of the Jungle" and the full gut nasty on the other.
Jealous much Abe dear?
Kidding.
I have a very tender gag reflex and probably would have returned the favor all over that middle school child's shoes. EEEWWWW..........
Are we supposed to call you Brendan now???
I have never been a huge Brenden Fraser fan, only cuz I am older than you and did not grow up with his movies.....however, again your approach is entertaining and I enjoyed it! Peace out, Cheeseboy!
I am so turned off by this actor that I could barely make it through this post without throwing up. But I did it for you, Cheeseboy. For you. Could you find someone to hold back my hair please? I think I commented too soon...
Genius post as always, I just hate this guy's career so much that I can't... stomach... it...
Re year 2000 - good to see you are setting traps to catch your playful wife. I'm just a little surprised you don't have more kids. Oh maybe they are in that bottom drawer of your refrigerator
Encino Man and the Mummy movies.. I could watch them over and over.
You are a nut! At least you have not mirrored Mel Gibson...
The only Brendan movie I've seen is George of the Jungle. He is nice eye candy!
Did you really grow up in PA and were you really raised by the Amish?
Oh wait, my daughter just informed me that I saw The Mummy and Journey to the Center Of the Earth. I forgot about those. Did I mention that he is nice eye candy?
I really love how your mind comes us with this. Compelling and addictive.
You are one of the funniest people on the interwebs
Strange fact: My former vice principal was the daughter of Lute Olson, the famed basketball couch of the University of AZ (Go Cats!)
Her brother, Lute's son, was the private chef for....Brenden Fraser.
Please post pictures of what you've bedazzled. I'm interested!
I knew there was a reason I liked you so much. The whole Brendan Fraser component. Well done.
These are disturbingly eerie coincidences, Cheeseboy, especially the Bloody Stools parallel.
Great post, as always!
xoRobyn
Mirror images for sure!
Love that gut on Brendan in the last pic...
I hate Brendan Fraser, but I like you. Hmmm, strange.
Bloody Stools? Really? Thinking about that might make me re-enact that scene from Abe in 2010. Blah!
Clearly Brendan Frasier has an agent who called every filmwriter (or producer or whatever-I'm not in the film business) and said "I have this actor, he is great as someone who doesn't know anything because he has been locked up or frozen or raised by apes" and every single one of them hired him. Freaky.
I had no idea that your lives paralleled so closely...
mmmmmm...love me some Brenden Frasier..but you forgot Mrs. Winterbourne! I love him in that movie!
My final straw came while I was driving to a golf course one morning and vomited Mennonite herbs all over the front seat of our 1994 Chevy Taurus.
i dont i've ever laughed so hard!
At any one of those stages, I'm sure you were a better actor than "sir" brendan...
great post!
Please post pictures from 1997... it was the time of incredible abs for Brendan in George of the Jungle. I would like to make an accurate comparison between your lives.
I feel as ashamed as I should for this comment.
:)
It's all beginning to make sense now.
MMmmmmmmm, Leah Thompson! Oh I was soooo in love her! :)
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