Friday, September 24, 2010

This is how big of a moron I am.

Actual thoughts I've had in the past 3 months.

- I think that I can actually make money on my blog now by using Google ads!

- I don't know if I have enough readers.  Maybe?  But it's free, so I am going to try it.

[2 weeks pass]

- It says here I have made 16 cents. That's it?!  I guess I won't be quitting my day job any time soon.  This is bogus.

[2 weeks pass]

- I wonder what would happen if I clicked on my own ads? I mean, they want people to visit the ads, right?  What do they care if it is me or some other knucklehead?  Visitors is visitors, right?

[2 weeks pass]

- $38?! This is incredible!  I have to start telling my wife to start clicking on the ads every time she visits too.  Now I really WILL be able to give up my day job soon.

[2 weeks pass] 

- $72?!  I'll be getting my first check soon.  I'm buying a new iPod.  No, a new back scratcher.  No, a new iPod, back scratcher combo: WITH a separate remote control.

- I am doubling my efforts - clicking twice as often.  I mean, the companies that pay for advertising like a lot of hits.  The more times I visit their site, the better chances I will eventually end up BUYING something!  They'll love me for this.

- I am a blog marketing genus.

[2 weeks pass]

- This email from Google is ridiculous!  What do they mean I "signed the agreement"?!  No one reads those stupid things.  Sure I clicked agree, but I thought I was simply agreeing to collecting money - boatloads and boatloads of money.

[2 weeks later - talking to a friend]

Friend: You thought you could get paid to click on your own ads?

Me: Yeah, so?

Friend: You're a moron.

Me: Yeah, I know. But I'm blogging this, so I win.

Friend: So, you'd rather have fodder over cash?

Me: I guess I don't have a choice now, do I?

66 comments:

Cherie said...

First! Cause it's cool and stuff!

Marlene said...

I'm totally cracking up over here!!! LOVE IT!!!! You really do make me laugh!

Cherie said...

That is hilarious! I have to say that I have actually had the same thoughts.
I think it is human nature.
You should have had your kids click on your blog - Yeah that's the ticket!

Mamma has spoken said...

See, you should have clicked on it at work, on your school computer. Then they wouldn't have known it was you. But if your school system is like mine, they could/would fire you for 'making money while using the school property' so maybe next time go to the public library and use their computers. Of course you might have to come up with an alias, but that could be fun in it's own rights.

Everyday Goddess said...

The only one who makes money doing this is Dooce.

Is she still called that anyway? I haven't been by there in ages. Bo-ring.

Amy said...

That is hysterical! I was wondering the same thing about those ads...if anyone ever made any money off them. Not so much, that is so funny!

Garden of Egan said...

Blog fodder over cash is awesome any day of the week.

Maybe by the time you retire you'll be able to take the Mrs out for some Geritol or something on all the money you are making.

Angela M. said...

Alright, I'll do it. I love to help out my fellow bloggers so I agree from now on to click on a Google ad on every blogger buddy blog I visit if they have the ads on their site. Didn't realize you get paid per click without having to purchase something :)

Rita/Fighting Off Frumpy said...

Google ads are kinda crappy. I made, like, a dollah. Which I never even got - because I took down the ads because they were dumb. Shouldn't I still get the money I earned? Ugh.

Missy said...

What if you are blogging from a community computer? That is dumb. Call a lawyer! LOL

Sam Liu said...

You're a comic wit and a entrepreneurial genius! Who'd a' thunk it, eh? :D

Pat said...

Damn! You mean like Big Brotha was watching you? That's SO not worth it! But great blog fodder!

ScoMan said...

You should have written your friends name as "Moron" instead of friend.

He might have called you a moron to your face, but you would have exposed him as a moron to the interweb.. so you know ,you win and stuff.

From Tracie said...

That just answered all the questions I have ever had about Google Ads.

What you need is an ad partner. You click theirs and they click yours. Your wife might get jealous though. Check with her first ;0)

Melinda said...

Dang it, guess I won't be doing ads anytime soon. Shoot.

Pearl said...

I considered doing that at one time. Glad you did, though, and wrote about it for us!

Pearl

Chaka said...

I feel your pain when it comes to Adsense. I've had their ads on my blogs for a couple years and finally hit the $100 mark where they say they will send you a check. Maybe I should wait to get my check before I say anything negative about it, but when I do the math, it comes out to about 4 or 5 cents an hour. Yipee!

Kristina P. said...

I truly wonder if anyone makes any money with Google Ads.

I wish I could get paid in tacos.

"Miss Bee" said...

I clicked on the Ebates ad for you. You're welcome. Don't spend your half a cent all at one place.

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

If I had the time, I'd click the ads repeatedly for you!

Nicole said...

Man - for one moment I thought "Hey, I could make some money just like my Cheese-Blog friend."

Rats!

Does this make me a moron?lol

harrison said...

Felon.

One Cluttered Brain said...

What? You are making $$$$?
but oops...not anymore?
Shucks. I almost put google ads on my site....

Silver Strands said...

Now you've made me laugh twice in a week!
Denalee

Just SO said...

Hey it was worth a shot right? I think so.

Copyboy said...

You totally captured my faux elation the first 3 months of blogging. BTW...I made you blog of the day today/tomorrow.

W.C.Camp said...

Yeah at a $1 per month of revenue it takes 8 years to get your first $100 Ad Sense check!! Whooo Hooo. W.C.C.

Lisa Loo said...

But a humble moron nonetheless---

M-Cat said...

Unless you hadn't explained it, I might have fallen into the same trap.

Except that I am such a moron, I wouldn't know how to even get google ads ON my blog.

Mighty M said...

You rock!! :)

Lolidots said...

The only people who make money off google ads are the make-believe people in the google ads telling you that you can make money off them!

Kelly H-Y said...

Hilarious! I added that at one point too ... then realized I could never make any money if I couldn't click on my own ads! :-)

RawknRobynsGoneBlogWild said...

You are so funny. I thought that was ingenious on your part. Sorry you didn't get away with it. Maybe you should've agreed to the terms with multiple clicks, just for kicks.
xoRobyn
PS I tend to wonder how many of my stat page views are my own.

Noelle said...

And this is why we love you, Cheeseboy.

Brian Miller said...

haha. love it...congrats on teh goddess award...

Everyday Goddess said...

yup, goddess award material! come over and collect it anytime!

nice new pledge btw.

A Mom on Spin said...

I'm clicking away on your ads now. . .

Marnie said...

This happened to a friend of mine and they sent him the same email. Dagnabit!

Cheryl said...

Yeah but they only track one ISP right? It's simple just use your work account and click from everyone's desktop. No?

TechnoBabe said...

I wonder how many people have actually tried this and really don't want to admit it. Do you have a Plan B now that the Google ad thing doesn't work?

Venassa said...

Haha too funny.
You should've made a deal with someone else. You click my ads, I click yours, everybody wins ;)

The Invisible Seductress said...

Laughing..... and laughing......

Eva Gallant said...

That was a great post! lol

baygirl32 said...

at least you made us laugh!

tammy said...

Usually I don't even notice if people have ads on their blogs, because I read most blogs in my Reader, then just click over to comment. Sorry I didn't help in your quest to become a millionaire. But really, what would you have done with all that money anyway?

The Mom @ Babes in Hairland said...

I'm not surprised you got an e-mail from them. They are totally anal about that. But you're not a moron for thinking like that! I know a site that was telling readers to click & Google took back the hundred of dollars they'd earned because of that. Sadly, it is in the "small print." But I bet you make a bunch of $ off this post, eh?! It's true though, Google ads are not the fastest way to earn $ off your blog. You need to start making outrageous videos more and see if YouTube will give you $ for those like they do for my cheesy hair tut's. That's actually where I've seen my Google $ coming in faster than from people clicking my ads on my blog. Good luck man!

Saimi said...

I wonder what Google pays for blogging about their adds....Who knows, there still might be a big fat check waiting for you yet!

Mommy Lisa said...

Totally it makes for GREAT blog fodder.

I wish I had done that.

MiMi said...

Thank goodness I know now that I can't do this. I was thinking about it.

DEZMOND said...

so what did Google do with you in the end??? :)

Kelly said...

I feel like you left us hanging here. What happened to your boat loads of money?

I am so ignorant when it comes to this stuff that I actually thought that adsense approached the popular blogs and asked them to advertise. That was like 6 months ago though. I am way more blog savvy now!

Not

Mary said...

I used all the computers in the college library to win a photo contest on MSN about 3 yrs ago. I won two digital photo frames, and a canon powershot :o)

Tammy said...

So . . . . . how much money did you really end up getting?

Emmy said...

I heard of a bunch of bloggers who agreed to click on each other's ads, but right before it was time for them to get their checks blogger pulled the plug on them.

But yes does make a good post.

Chris said...

First time visitor by way of Jenn's blog. I was expecting a food blog but what I found was hilarious. Fun blog.

mice_aliling said...

These moronic ideas makes us feel good. They are our comfort thoughts. So just let it be...it made ma laugh, though

http://micealiling.blogspot.com/

The Church Lady said...

Well, you certainly have ALOT of followers, so perhaps now after this post, your readers will be kind enough to click on the adds and boost your income!

Lourie said...

I guess I am a moron too, because I would totally do that. hahaha.

Unknown Mami said...

You are not the only moron to click on their own ads.

Rick said...

Great stuff- love your blog. We both got the Goddess award this week through stupidity it sounds like! Thanks for the laugh man

Joann Mannix said...

As I'm reading about your clicking, I'm yelling at my laptop, "No! Whatever you do, don't click, Cheeseboy!"

I don't dabble in the ads, but I hear it's a rip. Good luck. I'll click for you.

Teachinfourth said...

Bummer.

I guess you could always use your school computers and have all the kids click on your ads for you...

Powdered Toast Man said...

I think you are the first person to think of clicking on their own ads. You could of revolutionized the business.

Diane J. said...

How can I express how hard I'm laughing at this post?

You need to repost this once a year, it's destined to be a classic.

Marla said...

Seriously......you are too funny for words!

Snappy Di said...

heh heh heh..... nice try Mr. Wise Guy. You wuz caught red handed. LOL

Di