About 6 months ago, we returned from Saint George (named after the patron saint "George" who was known for his infinite wisdom in the ways of strip malls and long lines at the In and Out Burger), to find this on our front porch.
An old, rusty stove and a torn living chair.
A loving gift from someone that cares?
Was our front porch mistaken for a Deseret Industries drop off point?
How poor do people think we are?
A twisted prank by a neighborhood prank pervert?
Did my stalker finally buy the furniture she promised me?
Perhaps an RC Willey truck full of old, crappy furniture was accidentally left open and the furniture happened to roll onto our porch in perfect position?
Could it be that an illiterate used furniture salesman thought our "Ute fans live here" sign hanging from our mailbox actually said "Leave torn furniture on porch"?
Maybe some homeless people set up shop on our porch for a couple days and left us a thank you gift?
Does someone have an evil vendetta against a kindhearted First Grade teacher?
I think there is a fairly good chance that they filmed the garbage scene from Avatar on our front porch and forgot to take the garbage. (Was there a garbage scene in Avatar or am I thinking of the whole movie?)
Or perhaps the magical furniture unicorns simply dumped them there?
Discarding the items was easily. We simply placed them on a neighbor's porch that was out of town.
Figuring out how they they ended up on the porch is the real. challenge.
Any ideas out there in comment land?