Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Do people think we are poor or is it just magical furniture unicorns? A mystery to be sure.

About 6 months ago, we returned from Saint George (named after the patron saint "George" who was known for his infinite wisdom in the ways of strip malls and long lines at the In and Out Burger), to find this on our front porch.

An old, rusty stove and a torn living chair.

A loving gift from someone that cares?
Was our front porch mistaken for a Deseret Industries drop off point?
How poor do people think we are?
A twisted prank by a neighborhood prank pervert?
Did my stalker finally buy the furniture she promised me?
Perhaps an RC Willey truck full of old, crappy furniture was accidentally left open and the furniture happened to roll onto our porch in perfect position?
Could it be that an illiterate used furniture salesman thought our "Ute fans live here" sign hanging from our mailbox actually said "Leave torn furniture on porch"?
Maybe some homeless people set up shop on our porch for a couple days and left us a thank you gift?
Does someone have an evil vendetta against a kindhearted First Grade teacher?
I think there is a fairly good chance that they filmed the garbage scene from Avatar on our front porch and forgot to take the garbage. (Was there a garbage scene in Avatar or am I thinking of the whole movie?)
Or perhaps the magical furniture unicorns simply dumped them there?

Discarding the items was easily. We simply placed them on a neighbor's porch that was out of town.

Figuring out how they they ended up on the porch is the real. challenge.

Any ideas out there in comment land?


brermomo said...

Yes. Someone was bring a used washer and chair to their daughter's house, and they got the wrong address.

rebecca said...

Hm...methinks someone is definitely playing a practical joke. Time to play detective.

Shellie D. said...

Max Hall hates you...maybe he did it...

Shellie D. said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Kristina P. said...

Your furniture unicorn matches the unicorn on my face, from Disneyland.

Oh, and you forgot a show on your sidebar! Community!

RawknRobynsGoneBlogWild said...

All you need's a toilet. Then you could rent out your front porch.

Beth said...

We have discovered that there really is no need to call the city to arrange pick up of large items. Just set them out by the road and somebody will pull up and take them. What kills me are the ones that will stop and ask me what's wrong with it before helping themselves! I've heard that junk disappears even faster if you put a for sale sign on it. Weird world out there!

Noelle said...

To Cheeseboy with the chiseled abs...

Thanks for stopping by my blog.

And FYI, Boston Rob is on Survivor this season: Villans vs. Heros...he's a villian, and he's kicking their trash! You should watch it, all the old favorites are on!

Kelly H-Y said...

You are kidding! That is hilarious. Actually, I'm sure it was kind of annoying ... but your list of possible scenarios is quite funny!

Melinda said...

It *was* your stalker who left them there...

...hello, Clarice...

(I don't know how that fits into stalker, but its totally creepy right?! RIGHT?!)

Nikki said...

So funny. And even funnier that you blogged it. Thanks for sharing this experience with us!

GrammyMouse said...

humm, maybe someone is sending you decorating ideas? I go with stick a '4 sale" sign on them..
they will grow legs & walk away!

sending springy weather your way!

tammy said...

I'm only commenting because you're granting me lifetime sexiness.

I have no idea who planted them there, but I do have many ideas on playing back the joke when you find out who it was.

First one - roosters in their backyard, delivered in the middle of the night, so they wake up to some crowing.

Anonymous said...

I am surprised that someone took the time to set them on the porch, not just dump in your drive.
I would take the Unicorn table - matches my Elephant table.
(not an elephant fan, but I like Unicorns!)

Cheeseboy said...

@ Brermomo - Very well could be. But boy would their daughter have crummy taste in furniture. I am pretty sure there was a squirrel nest in the chair.

@ Rebecca - Right you are. I have been detectiving for 6 months with no luck.

@ Shellie - Ha HA!!! Still glad he hates me.

@ Kristina - I kept waiting for Community to get better, but I kinda gave up on it. Shame because I think Joel McHale is hilarious. I might have to give it another try.

@ Rawkn - Fortunately, my neighbors probably have a toilet on their porch, so they can just go over there.

@ Beth - Well, I am sure the city eventually got it. Just after it went through 3 or 4 families that happened to not be at home.

Noelle - Okay, I actually saw a commercial for it while watching Greatest Race. I might have to try it again. but I barely have time to watch Community...

@Kelly H-Y - You don't know how annoying it was! What was even more annoying is recruiting a neighbor to help me move it to someone elses. However, the neighbor I recruited might have been the perp.

@ Melinda - I don't have a stalker, but I am looking for one. I actually started this post as "Qualifications my future stalker must have".

@ Nikki - yes. I have been meaning to blog it for 6 months now.

@ Grammy - Perhaps decorating types from Beetlejuice?

@ Tammy - LOL! You don't know how funny that comment is. The person I highly suspect of this crime lives across the street and is always complaining about their backyard neighbors that actually own roosters that wake them up in the morning.

@ Dogsmom - Yep, that unicorn table is pretty much the sweetest thing I have ever seen.

Tammy said...

The answer is obvious Abe. It's someone who knows my parents. I see my mom in the reflection of the window. I'm sure her little mind is going and she's wondering how she can ask you for these precious items so she can take them to her St George house.

Sco said...

Garbage scene? Thinking of Star Wars you must be. That's a seriously sweet prank. What better place to relax while baking chocolate chip cookies - from the comfort of your porch.