News items I could care less about.

Here are some stories in the news that I have zero interest in and wish they would just go away:

1. The relationship status of John and Kate. I don't care who John is dating. I don't care if he is unfaithful. I don't care if Kate is a jerk. I don't care if they are getting divorced. I don't care that they have 1,000 kids. I don't care if they have a show on some network no one has ever heard of. I don't care.

2. What Miss California thinks about gay marriage. Also, I don't care if she had naked photos of her taken when she was 18. I've never heard of her before and I would have liked to keep it that way.

3. Any news about the Bachelors or former Bachelors or former women on The Bachelor or the host of The Bachelor. I don't care.

4. Michael Phelps

5. The yo yo weight of Kristie Allie. Don't care. Oprah's interview about yo you diet: I care less than not caring, if that's possible.

6. Anything involving a new flare up of the Swine Flu and potential deaths in the fall. Fool me once...

7. Stories about how the recession is making us fat and unhealthy. Care I don't. Also, blaming the recession for every problem ever.

8. Did I mention John & Kate Plus 8 news? I don't like them, I don't care about them and I don't want to hear about them.

9. Michelle Obama's arms. Nice arms. Don't care.

10. Information on Max Hall's full bodied spandex workout routine by Dick Harmon. Who does care about this?