English was always my favorite subject, but I have a shameful secret. Actually, it is not much of a secret anymore at all. If you are an English major and read my blog, it is probably painfully obvious to you. My secret is that I have absolutely no idea how to use a semicolon properly.
The semicolon is located below the pinkie finger on the keyboard in the primary position. A S D F J K L ;
I learned that in third grade. Because of my semicolon ignorance, my pinkie finger is the least worked of all my digits. If you look at my fingers, each one is a chiseled mass of muscle. My right pinkie, on the other hand (quite literally, on the other hand) looks like a starving Ethiopian with a cleft pallet.
***If you would like to sponsor my right pinkie, you may send $5.00 a month addressed to:
Cheeseboy's Malnourished Pinkie
Right Hand, First Digit
Save The Finger Plaza, UT 90210
FYI, I refuse to ever use smiley faces and cutesy bologna in my writing. This has also severely limited my semicolon use and thus, the use of my right pinkie.