Thursday, August 6, 2009

I have a painful confession ;;;

English was always my favorite subject, but I have a shameful secret. Actually, it is not much of a secret anymore at all. If you are an English major and read my blog, it is probably painfully obvious to you. My secret is that I have absolutely no idea how to use a semicolon properly.

The semicolon is located below the pinkie finger on the keyboard in the primary position. A S D F J K L ;

I learned that in third grade. Because of my semicolon ignorance, my pinkie finger is the least worked of all my digits. If you look at my fingers, each one is a chiseled mass of muscle. My right pinkie, on the other hand (quite literally, on the other hand) looks like a starving Ethiopian with a cleft pallet.

***If you would like to sponsor my right pinkie, you may send $5.00 a month addressed to:

Cheeseboy's Malnourished Pinkie
Right Hand, First Digit
Save The Finger Plaza, UT 90210

FYI, I refuse to ever use smiley faces and cutesy bologna in my writing. This has also severely limited my semicolon use and thus, the use of my right pinkie.

2 comments:

lindsey v said...

I think the semicolon is used when you write a complete sentence; then add on a little more.

Just kidding. I don't really know either.

You better start playing the guitar to build up that important pinky muscle. What will happen when you really, really need it and all you will have is a lifeless phalange?

Now that I think of it, I guess even when you play the guitar, your right pinky isn't used much.
I have no advice for you.

Tammy said...

I never know when to use it either. And now days people use whatever they want to whenever they want to so I guess it doesn't really matter :)

I told Lori people are going to think Brandon's not very smart because he always misspells things on FB but again, that's how people do it now.

Adding to Lindsey's comment . . . I guess you could start playing the piano to use your pinky finger more.

And Lindsey, I would have thought your example was just a regular little comma so I guess I really don't know!