My new Indian name is "Pooh-in-hand".

My son, Calder loves to take showers.  Well today was no exception and after I got in, he soon joined me, as he often does.  He loves when I hold him up to the shower head so that he can put his head directly under the water...

Well, today I was holding up, one hand under his bottom, one hand on his back, when I felt something warm and gooey enter my palm.  I looked down and realized that Calder had given me a three inch log as a kindhearted gift.  I screamed for Cathi as I held it in my hand like it was a baby bird.  I was just going to hand it to Cathi when she came in, but I was kind and told her to get some toilet paper.  Her eyes watered with laughter and she giggled uncontrollably as she wrapped the load in toilet paper and threw it in the toilet.  Thus, my new name, "Pooh-In-Hand".