Tuesday, September 13, 2011

First Grade Divas

The following was a conversation I had with a first grade class after reading the word "diva" in the book Lilly's Purple Plastic Purse. The names have been changed. Even mine.

Cheeseboy: Does anyone know what the word "diva" means?

Cindy: Yes, that is a girl that is really bad.  Does really bad things and stuff.

Cheeseboy: Well, yes. Some divas do very bad things.  But not all.

Lisa: A diva is like a girl singer. A girl singer that is famous.

Cheeseboy: Yes! That's right.

Amanda: I know a diva. Hannah Montana is a diva.

Gerald: Hannah Montana? I've been there. It takes like 4 hours to drive there.

Cindy: Hannah Montana's real name is Miley Kie-rus.

Cheeseboy: You mean Miley Cy-rus?

Cindy: No... Miley... KIE-RUS!

Cheeseboy: No, the C makes the S sound in Cyrus.

Cindy: I know it's KIE-RUS. I have the magazines.

Cheeseboy: Okay.

Amanda: Lady Gaga is a diva!

Lisa: I LIKE HER!

Cindy: My mom says she is one of the divas that does really bad stuff like I was talking about before.

Cheeseboy: Okay, that's great girls. Let's get back to our story now. As I was saying...

Larry: JUSTIN BEIBER IS A DIVA! HE SINGS LIKE A GIRL!

Amanda: No he is not! He is not a diva!

Cheeseboy: [Laughing hard now] Yes, I guess he does sing like a girl. But you actually HAVE to be a girl to be a diva.

Amanda: His girlfriend is Selena Gomez. She is a diva.

Larry: YEAH, THEY'RE BOTH DIVAS!

Cheeseboy: Alright, settle down. Yes, Selean Gomez is a diva. Justin Bieber is not. Alright, back to the story.

Jenny: The Little Mermaid, Ariel, she's is a diva.

Cheeseboy: Yes, I suppose she is.

Adrienne: AND TANGLED! Tangled is a diva!

Cheeseboy: Yep. Tangled is a diva. Is Tangled her name? Ah, nevermind. Okay, as I was saying...

Jenny: Mr. Cheeseboy, who's Lady Gaga?
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A good friend of mine's brother has recently started a blog called "Stoney Acres".  It is a blog dedicated to farming and becoming self efficient in an urban setting.  Very interesting.  Stop by and give it a look or follow. Click here.

64 comments:

Unknown said...

Snow White was the original Diva. She even had that tattooed on her butt.

Kristina P. said...

It's a good thing the Diva Cup didn't come up. That would have been super awkward.

Unknown said...

HAHA... that was quite entertaining! I love that J-Biebs was thrown into the mix! Love that kid. :)

Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kate Geisen said...

I love this conversation. It's so funny the direction conversations can go, sometimes hilariously sad. When I student taught in a 2nd grade classroom, I was reading The Stinky Cheese Man and had just read the line "Run, run, as fast as you can. You can't catch me, I'm the stinky cheese man," when one of the kids piped up, "You can't catch a crackhead!"

"Uhhhhhhh....and you can't catch the stinky cheese man, either."

Baby Sister said...

Hahahahaha. Justin Bieber should totally be a diva. :)

Emmy said...

I am happy to report my first grader would have no clue who most of those people are....however his little sister who thinks she is a diva and wants to be a rockstar just might.

Ally said...

That is so cute. It sorta oddly reminds me of that scene in Kindergarten Cop. I guess that scene gets played out in classrooms all over America all the time. I also love that two of the kids I wrote books about apparently have a following with such a young audience. Ha ha!

The Bipolar Diva said...

Your days teaching are totally book worthy.

sinika said...

Most of my 5 year old primary class broke out in a Justin Bieber song- the other day when one of them found out I didn't know it. How come I find myself singing (horrible) solos when the lesson calls for a class song??? But they all know the Biebs.

Alison said...

I am so not surprised Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga got thrown into the conversation. I bet even if you were talking about cheese, someone will mention the Bieber and Gaga. Kids!

The Jules said...

I think my 18 month-old daughter might be a diva. She is pouty and demanding. And occasionally poos herself.

A Daft Scots Lass said...

@OM I agree that SW was the original Diva but I doubt whether she had a tattoo on her fekkin' butt!

Maybe a tramp stamp but not on her butt.

Unknown said...

I'm impressed any first grader would know that a diva is a female singer.

"Miley KYE-rus. I've got all the magazines": Now that was funny!

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Hey, the discussion could've been uglier!

Jen said...

Ha! And since I am a total diva, I liked this.

Melinda said...

Oh First Grade! I miss having conversations about the stuff that really matters in life.

Unknown said...

LOL.. I love your stories about your class! Kids are too funny!

Middle-aged Mormon Man said...

It is becoming more apparent to my why you teach - the sheer entertainment value is incentive.

Pearl said...

Silly teacher. It's pronounced "KIR-rus"!

Sheesh. She HAS the magazines, after all!

Pearl

Connie said...

How can you keep a straight face during a conversation like that? And to think it all started from reading an innocent children's book.

You're in for a fun year!

Jonah Gibson said...

This conversation is really cute when it's had with a classroom full of six year-olds. Not so much when you have almost the exact same conversation with a classroom full of 14 year-olds.

Kelly Krewson said...

I can't stop giggling.

Stoney Acres said...

We have a 7 year old that thinks SHE is a diva so this is very funny.

Cheese Boy thank you for the shout out on my blog, I really appreciate it!!

Stoney Acres

Joann Mannix said...

You want to see divas? Come to my house. My three girls invented the word. And Justin Bieber is a diva, him and his big round roller hairbrush.

And by the way, Lily's Purple Plastic Purse is one of my absolute favorite kid reads, along with every other Kevin Henkes book.

Lene said...

You must be really proud of your gifted class.

Amanda said...

One thing I miss about my boys getting older is I don't have these zingers anymore! Like when they both were whispering "spider farts" in the back seat, then cackling like maniacs.

Weirdos -- I must admit they come by it honestly :)

AGuidingLife said...

hey hey, well done...that raised a drink came out the nostril laugh...prurrrdy impressive :)

Cperz said...

That is too funny. Seems if you are at all uncertain about the proper pronunciation of a word, you have Cindy available to set you straight.

Silver Strands said...

Headed over to Stoney Acres now :)

Bees With Honey said...

Hilarious! I have SO had those type of conversations with first graders before. Kids are so funny.

Danielle said...

I don't know. I've known a few male divas in my time. But drag queens are probably not an appropriate topic in a 1st grade classroom.

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

You opened a can of worms (pink, sparkly ones too) with that question, Cheeseboy. I'm not sure which side I'd take on the Bieber-diva argument.
xoRobyn

Saimi said...

And just exactly what did you tell Jenny about Lady Gaga? I mean, I kinda would like to know myself!

Workingdan said...

I think Justin Bieber qualifies as a diva! haha! The little queer!

Unknown said...

So funny! It must be hard keeping a straight face when you're teaching young kids. I'm kinda surprised they knew so much about divas. I just asked my 2nd grader if he knew what "diva" meant and he said he had no clue.

rhonda said...

how do you keep from just busting out laughing? seriously i need to know, in a little over a year they're going to turn me loose in a classroom. whoa!

Crystal Pistol said...

You have the best job EVER! (I couldn't do it, you understand.)

I'm glad you report the goings on in that place! Hilarious.

j said...

Being around kids is like driving a car on a wet road - so easy to lose control of the situation. The conversation cracked me up!

And I must agree with that very deep question... who IS Lady Gaga? :)

mCat said...

`The fun of being with littles who attention span is that of a gnat.

Wait...that's me.

Funny stuff Abe!

Kev D. said...

Makes me wish I was a teacher.

Lourie said...

Justin Beiber is totally a DIVA! I can't stand that kid...I mean .... errr... that's funny...BHAHAHAHAHA!

Living Life said...

I wonder if there really is a town in Montana called Hannah? Hee hee - - very cute.

Holly said...

ACTUALLY... I think I know a few MALE divas! LOL!! Kids make the BEST blog fodder!! Especially the ones in your class! ;D

Julie said...

Working with kids is an adventure everyday. I don't have school kids but I have daycare kids and I love listening to them. I love this story, I love your writings. It's been awhile since I've stopped by so have some reading to do. Take care and have a blessede weekend.

Julie said...

By the way I am haveing a blast at Stoney Acres. Thank you for your friend.

Teachinfourth said...

Mr. Cheeseboy is a diva, too...but a boy diva.

;)

Your friend doesn't own a beet farm, does he?

"Bears, beets, Battlestar Galactica..."

Sara @ Domestically Challenged said...

Oh dear...they keep learning it younger don't they?!

Powdered Toast Man said...

I guess Selena Gomez hasn't found Justin Bieber's vagina yet.

Claudya Martinez said...

Cheeseboy, sometimes I wonder if you are a Diva.

Kristen said...

Do you HAVE to be a girl to be a Diva? Bet that would have been fun to explain to the kids.... ;)

Marnie said...

I love love love this! I just posted an open letter to Selena Gomez...I just had to! xo

Becky @ Babes in Hairland said...

This is even funnier reading the whole thing and not just the snippets you'd posted on FB! Glad you were able to figure out how to spell it here though! lol Thanks for the good laugh!

AiringMyLaundry said...

Ha, my daughter is going as Ariel for Halloween. She'd agree that Ariel is a diva. And Tangled.

It just scares me when grown adults call themselves divas like it's a GOOD thing.

Macey said...

Those are freakin' hilarious!
And. Lady Gaga is NOT a diva. She's a guy.

Lazarus said...

Abe, you're too busy on Facebook and not enough on Blogger...what gives? Your fans need you, get back to the blogosphere ASAP!

sprinkles said...

I wish you were still blogging, I miss your posts.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Kitty Moore said...

Hey, I'm back! Where are you?!

DB Stewart said...

WHERE ARE YOU?

Anonymous said...

Miss you!!!!

Cluttered Brain said...

lol...you are a diva cheeseboy! No wait your a guy...i bet your wife is a diva...love u my cheeseboy blogger friend!

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estetik said...

hope u have a wonderful day & awaiting for more new post. Keep Blogging!
Estetik